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Deeper Issues Needing Attention

15th February 2012 by under Deeper Issues     

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Deeper Issues Needing Attention

-”the distance between what is and what I want is my pain today”, Stephen Levine

-what is and what I accept is my need for medication today

-the unconscious drivers are operational in us all

-every family system or network forms a chain of being through the generations, which tend to accumulate unidentified and ungrieved losses, which build internal pain in the incarnate.

-being wounds are embedded within the unconscious and are often shame based (example, sexual childhood interference, violence in the home, scapegoating)

-these are transferred below the level of awareness and erupt in the child when dependency needs are not met

-unaware of this dynamic the teen, adult and elder of this family network begins to experience increasing levels of pain which reaches a point where it must be medicated

-addictions are born here, live here and die here

-we never learn how to identify what is hurting us and how we might heal it

-we never learn how to identify losses and grieve them

-our only alternative is to medicate, usually we begin with tobacco

-an overview large enough to encompass the wounded nature of the unknown is required to build a recovery plan that has any hope of working

-the trans-generational dynamics are key here.

Healing In Time With Love and Commitment

“What patterns are repeating in the family system?”

“Once we travel down this road we are finally on the path to freedom.”

More on this as the blog evolves.

Any questions please e-mail Professor Murray Kelly at psi@igs.net or murray.kelly20@yahoo.ca

 

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The Three Questions

5th January 2012 by Professor Murray Kelly under Blog     

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The Three Questions.

These are designed to provide you or your counselor with enough information to structure a nicotine withdrawal approach, which will give you a ‘steady state’ of nicotine levels and keep you out of acute withdrawal while you learn how to live tobacco free.

1. How old where you when you started smoking?

-If you started before 16 you may have a loss issue in childhood that needs attending to and tobacco is part of your survival strategy. Be alert to this and grieve your losses.

2. How long after rising do you need a smoke?

-If you smoke within 20 minutes after rising it may be skillful to awaken with high nicotine levels so you will not relapse in the morning. Put a patch on at 4:00 a.m. Go back to sleep.

3. How many cigarettes do you smoke on a rough day?

-If you smoke 15 or more on tough days then you may find it helpful to use a self dosing strategy to self regulate your tension and anxiety build up.

Self-Dosing

It has proven very useful to have a means of self-dosing with nicotine when under stress to prevent a build up leading to relapse. We suggest an inhaler, 4 mg. nicotine gum, or the nicotine lozenges. Simply dose until you feel relaxed and the stress build up has passed.

Together this works wonders for most. The patch provides the steady release of nicotine and the self-dosing devices allow for self-regulating under stressful conditions until we learn how to do this on our own without medicating. Good Luck Dear Smokers Trying To Quit.

The Murr.

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